​​When I was a little girl I used to love blowing dandelions when they had turned white and fluffy. It was fun to watch the little seeds be propelled by me blowing on them and then watching them be caught by the wind in carried off. I remember one time I was enjoying this activity when and an adult told me to "Stop doing that, don't you know you will just spread them even more!" I was kind of stunned at their reaction. I thought more of these would be quite nice but after that time, I was more cautious about when and where I enjoyed this activity. I made sure I was in a field where it would not matter if there were more of them. I made sure I wasn't standing on someone's lawn. 

The fascination of watching the effect I had on the dandelion puff and knowing it would aid in creating other dandelions was a memorable summertime activity. Following the seeds, as they took flight on the breeze and traveled in different directions was the highlight. 

Through a simple act of blowing on this tenacious little flower other dandelions are created. A good leader's actions should be similar. A goal of leadership should be to create other leaders. Many times those in leadership feel it is their goal to keep good employees under their watchful eye and not encouraged them to go forward and become leaders as well. A good leader should not fear other leaders growing among their group. They should encourage it!

In today's world, leadership is a much-used term. There is a need for strong, good, and able leaders throughout the business world, politics, and other aspects of life. The shortage in these kinds of leaders is more due to fear and selfishness from some leaders in their pursuit to build their own kingdom instead of developing other kingdoms. The word develop means to, "grow or cause to grow and become mature, advanced, or elaborate." The world needs leaders that develop other leaders. The world needs leaders that will blow encouragement, training, and experience across others so they can become leaders as well. Leadership is about giving to others and their community and creating other leaders. These new leaders are not clones of the original leader, but leaders with their own special talents that are able to carry their skills to new places, bloom where they are planted, and then breathe the breath of leadership across others. 

Sometimes the simple activities of blowing across a flower puff can help create life in a new location, the breath of great leadership should do the same.

Don't tell people how to do things, tell them what to do and let them surprise you with their results. - George S. Patton


I have always appreciated this quote. It falls into line with part of my thoughts on leadership. In my previous roles as a manager or supervisor this was something I often considered when determining when to involve myself and when to let go. The issue is sometimes leadership quotes, while seemingly good most of the time are not always right. It is in knowing how to assess a situation and determine the right course of action that often makes the difference in successful leadership and just being in charge.

I learned early on as a parent and a leader in my home that sometimes the best ideas on leadership need to be evaluated when dealing with children. If you truly want to know what kind of leadership style you possess go and work with children for a few days. It is one of the surest ways to know if you are truly a leader or just someone who thinks they are in charge.

I have often thought of the quote of above when remembering a time when I asked my 3 oldest children to clean their bathroom. They were roughly at the ages of four, seven, and ten.  I explained I wanted the bathroom straightened up and then told the older two to use a cleaning product to wipe down the surfaces and they needed to mop the floor. I told them I would be back up to check in about 45 minutes. Twenty minutes into their assignment I heard several loud noises that sounded like someone falling. I yelled upstairs, "Is everyone ok?" To which they responded, "Yes!" Another ten minutes went by and I continued to hear a thud ever so often. I decided to go and check and see what was happening. Upon opening the bathroom door, I  discovered they were cleaning the bathroom floor by putting liquid soap on it and using the floor as a skating rink. They thought they were ingenious, I was questioning their sanity.  As you can imagine, getting liquid hand soap off a linoleum floor is quite the job. 

There were three takeaways I learned that day:

1. Being a successful leader often means knowing when to apply certain leadership principles and when to apply others. There are many books, quotes, and articles that talk about the best leadership principles and many of them are right on track, the true knowledge and sign of a successful leader is in knowing when and where to apply them. General Patton was correct in the above quote, a leader can be surprised by the end result. In order to get the right kind of surprise or end result, sometimes a few parameters may be needed. The goal of a good leader should be to let their team operate in such as way as they can provide the desired results with little intervention from the leader. A leader should be willing to pitch in and help when it is needed but their main function should be to guide, set the course, and encourage their team to arrive at the desired the goal.
2. When the results surprise you, don't always react negatively. Sometimes these moments become teachable moments and can be used to instruct and teach. Overreacting or losing your temper at these kind of moments rarely achieves the desired result. That day I let the lesson of them cleaning the soap off the floor the proper way, be the lesson as to why you don't skate in liquid soap to clean the floor.  Now there were some stern words on the safety issues of skating in a bathroom where they could have fallen and hit their head on the counter, tub, etc., but the overall goal was understanding on their part so they would not repeat the same result and patience on mine to not take over the project and do it "the right way". 
3. Everyday events have the ability to teach us a lot about ourselves and others. Leadership requires being teachable and having a willingness to learn things from events whether the outcome is positive or difficult. Learning and being teachable should help us become the best us and leader we can become. 

I often smile when I come across General Patton's quote. It reminds me, not only of the day of skating in liquid soap but also reminds me sometimes I need to provide parameters and step back and sometimes I need to be more involved. Leadership principles and ideas should guide and direct and provide a foundation to operate from but in the end, it is knowing which ones to use and when that distinguishes the successful leader. 

There is communication and then there is successful communication. There are three key concepts to successful communication, the Three C's. The three C's are context, clarification, and connection. Leadership and communication often flounder because a lack of all or some of these three important components in the message from the leader, and/or a lack of participation by the individual or group to make sure they apply these to the message.

Several years ago my two middle children were involved with a Science Olympiad team. One of the events was called, "Write It – Do It" In this event, teams of two students were involved in recreating a structure of something. The first student would be sent into a room to look at the structure created from various items. The items ranged from clay, nuts, bolts, wire, and/or various other construction or craft items. The first student then had 25 minutes to write an items list and instructions on how to create the model. Then the second student would come in, after the item had been removed and the first student had left, and have 20 minutes to recreate the same structure without seeing it and based only on a pile of items and the instructions the first student wrote. As you can imagine, the written instructions were key to the successful recreation of the initial structure. 

My son, who was twelve at the time, and his nine-year-old sister were a team.  We would often have them practice for this event. One particular practice round reiterated the importance of the Three C's. My son was tasked with writing the instructions and the items list for the structure they had to recreate. 

The items they were given were: 

1. 3 clothes pins 
2. 2 golf tees,
3. 1 tan fuzz ball

When I looked at the items list and instructions he had written the items needed were: 

1. 3 clothes pins
2. 2 "weird cracker barrel things"
3. 1 tan fuzz ball. 

I had to take a moment and think. This was not the same list. After looking at the list, I began to laugh. Now, to provide some context as you read this, we are not a golfing family. My kids and I have never been golfing because I am sure the putt-putt variety doesn't really count. Their dad may have golfed a couple of times in college but my kids did not have any experience with golfing or golfing equipment.  I know it is probably a major southern parenting fail to not have your kids go golfing at least one, but they have survived so far. Now, if you look back at the list again, and you have eaten at a Cracker Barrel restaurant you will see where context in the message comes into play.  He had named the 2 golf tees as the 2 "weird cracker barrel things". While we have little to no experience with golf, we do have quite a bit of experience eating at Cracker Barrel and playing the peg games on the tables. His sister had no problem knowing what he was talking about and they were able to successfully recreate the practice item. Had his instructions been given to another student, there probably would have been some confusion. Sibling pairs often do well at this event because they have shared life experiences and therefore have a context in their communication. Establishing context and understanding is critical in business and personal communication. Knowing who is receiving the message and where they are coming from often plays a key role in how and whether a message is accepted and understood.

While context was important in their practice event, I had to clarify what was written because my context and life experience and general knowledge of golf told me that was a golf tee.  I clarified by asking my son about it and he confirmed what I had thought.  Now if another student had been partnered with my son, there could have been some issues. Since the event does not allow the students to ask each other questions or to clarify the instructions, the initial set has to be very clear and understandable.  In any communication, clarification is important in making sure all parties are discussing the same issues and ideas or are headed toward the same goal. Clarifying the message helps in making sure the desired outcome is accomplished. Leadership is often about clarifying the message. 

The third C is connection. In this case, my son and daughter had a family connection and knew each other quite well. They were able to cut through some of the more structured and finer details because they had their own kind of way of communicating and understanding each other. In business, particularly in engaging potential or new customers, it is critical to build a connection or relationship. Building a relationship and connection helps in creating a foundation of understood context and a clarified message.

Often it is thought that it is a leader's responsibility to make sure their communication strategy contains The Three C's, but in reality, it is always the responsibility of any communicator to utilize these three concepts to achieve successful communication. Whether in a professional or personal arena, adding these concepts to communication helps in making sure the message is received and understood more clearly.  Clear messages produce clear action items and a clear path to achieve a goal. 

Successful communication is not difficult but does require all players to utilize context, clarification, and connection. Whether it is the person speaking or the person receiving the message, these three concepts need to be put into practice.  In the end, it is important to remember, sometimes a golf tee is not a golf tee.

​When I was a little girl I used to love blowing dandelions when they had turned white and fluffy. It was fun to watch the little seeds be propelled by me blowing on them and then watching them be caught by the wind in carried off. I remember one time I was enjoying this activity when and an adult told me to "Stop doing that, don't you know you will just spread them even more!" I was kind of stunned at their reaction. I thought more of these would be quite nice but after that time, I was more cautious about when and where I enjoyed this activity. I made sure I was in a field where it would not matter if there were more of them. I made sure I wasn't standing on someone's lawn. 

The fascination of watching the effect I had on the dandelion puff and knowing it would aid in creating other dandelions was a memorable summertime activity. Following the seeds, as they took flight on the breeze and traveled in different directions was the highlight. 

Through a simple act of blowing on this tenacious little flower other dandelions are created. A good leader's actions should be similar. A goal of leadership should be to create other leaders. Many times those in leadership feel it is their goal to keep good employees under their watchful eye and not encouraged them to go forward and become leaders as well. A good leader should not fear other leaders growing among their group. They should encourage it!

In today's world, leadership is a much-used term. There is a need for strong, good, and able leaders throughout the business world, politics, and other aspects of life. The shortage in these kinds of leaders is more due to fear and selfishness from some leaders in their pursuit to build their own kingdom instead of developing other kingdoms. The word develop means to, "grow or cause to grow and become mature, advanced, or elaborate." The world needs leaders that develop other leaders. The world needs leaders that will blow encouragement, training, and experience across others so they can become leaders as well. Leadership is about giving to others and their community and creating other leaders. These new leaders are not clones of the original leader, but leaders with their own special talents that are able to carry their skills to new places, bloom where they are planted, and then breathe the breath of leadership across others. 

Sometimes the simple activities of blowing across a flower puff can help create life in a new location, the breath of great leadership should do the same.

In Atlanta, Georgia there is a landmark restaurant called, The Varsity. I am sure most people who have visited Atlanta have at least heard of it or have eaten there. I know, as a local, it is one of those places you generally take out of town guests to or just stop by once in a while for a taste of local flavor. One of the defining things about The Varsity is what you hear when you enter the restaurant, the employees behind the counter yell out, “What’ll ya have? What’ll ya have?” It is an invite to come to the counter and order. For far too many businesses, their employees silently seem to shout, “Why are you here? Why are you here? Or in other terms, “Do you really have to be here?”
 
Often great customer service seems elusive or only possible for larger companies that can afford the training programs for it. The reality is even the smallest company, can afford and offer great customer service. The key is in four foundational elements called the 4E’s to Great Customer Service.
​

• Employ the right people 
• Educate your Employees.
• Empower Your Employees 
• Elevate success

 
Putting these 4E’s into consistent practice can help create great customer service. The real key is making sure all levels of your company practice them regardless of dealing with internal or external customers. It is critical to create an atmosphere of great customer service within the walls of your organization so that those that enter in to do business with you can feel it as well.
 
Next time you are in Atlanta, Georgia make a trip to The Varsity and hear them call out, What’ll ya have? What’ll ya have?” In the meantime, make sure your business is echoing that in their everyday interactions with customers as they project, “How can I serve? How can I serve?”
 
 

​Parents often wonder what their child will be when the child grows up.  As a parent, I know we have run through several different ideas by each of our children as to what they will study in college and what they want to do with their life.  Parents are often willing to put money into dance classes, athletic programs, and training to help their children become the best career person or student of a particular field of study. Often though they forget one critical area that every career needs for success.  It is the one thing in which all fields rely on and what every successful individual in whatever field they choose needs to possess. What is this "one thing" you may ask that crosses every career and discipline?  It is the ability to effectively communicate.  Communication is not just public speaking.  It is the day to day exchange of ideas and concepts between co-workers, management, the public, and the many other people we come into contact with each day.  Whether your child is a doctor explaining a diagnosis to an anxious family in a waiting room, or delivering a  speech at a medical symposium, or an IT professional working with colleagues to solve a programming problem, or musician trying to organize a concert, they will be using communication skills.  

Communication skills are more than just talking.  These skills include listening, processing, verbal and non-verbal skills, deciphering, organizing thoughts and ideas, presenting, and understanding who they are speaking with regardless of the situation.  In today's world, these are skills most teens are lacking and they often do not understand the value of them.  You will often hear a teen say, "I don't need to take a communications class because I won't have to give a speech in the career I am going into."  Well, that is just an assumption that can not be made.  We need to drop the idea that a communications class or speech class is just about giving speeches.  Yes, that is a component but the major idea is teaching students the different aspects of communication whether those are with them and one other person or within a whole group of people.  In fact, "Some experts have estimated that the average business executive spends 75 to 80 percent of the time communicating, about 45 minutes of every hour." 
(http://emedia.leeward.hawaii.edu/hurley/ebc10/mod-1/1_readings/1.2_readings_dev-your-comm-skills.htm)

As our technology progresses, information is readily available at our fingertips.  The future of successful people and leaders will depend on their ability to communicate this information and how it affects those around them and what actions steps are needed to utilize the information.  If there is one skill every student should spend some time learning it is how to communicate effectively - from active listening to following directions, to talking about their ideas.  As Lee Iacocca once said, "You can have brilliant ideas, but if you can't get them across, your ideas won't get you anywhere." Make sure your students have opportunities to learn and practice communication skills to become effective communicators!

​In today's world, we often lament the state of the world and criticize the youth and young adults of our society.  We clamor about racism, economic inequity, misguided and self-centered politicians and yet we are no further in solving the problem today as we were 10 or 20 years ago.  We can look at many different people and ideas to blame but there is one thing we need to acknowledge as an issue and a possible positive direction we can head to start to change things. There is a verse in the Bible in Matthew 6:21 that says, " For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."  This is a powerful verse because it talks about the things you treasure being your focus.  If we look around in society today it doesn't take long to see what society, especially American society, treasures.  We focus on media and sports.  I won't even go into the disparity of pay for professional athletes and entertainers because I want to go a little deeper than that.  If we want to be honest about the state of our world it is because we gave up substance for the superficial. 

In reality, this often starts in our children's educational and extracurricular pursuits.  In America, according to the annual High School Athletics Participation Survey conducted by the National Federation of State High School Associations (NFHS), " The number of participants in high school sports increased for the 25th consecutive year in 2013-14 with a record total of
almost 7.8million."(http://www.nfhs.org/articles/high-school-participation-increases-for-25th-consecutive-year/)  That is right -  almost 7.8 million high school-aged students participate in sports.  This number has steadily increased over the past several years.  While this appears to be a good number of students, let us look at another number.  Currently, the National Speech and Debate Association has around 140,000 high school students as active members.  Let us look at these numbers - 7.8 million compared to around 140,000.  We can definitely tell where our treasure or focus is as a society.

While I in no means want to disparage participating in sports because there are many benefits to playing a sport, I want to draw attention to the fact that this disparity reflects many of our disparities in society.  If we want to change societal issues it is not going to be done in a sports arena or playing field.  This is done through stimulating and intelligent discourse and debate about the issues.  We have decided that it is more important to entertain ourselves and our children than to give them a voice to make a change.

For many parents and students, you will hear them say but there are scholarships to be had in sports and then there is the possibility of a professional career.  I think we need to take a look at the sobering numbers.  According to CBS News, "Only about 2 percent of high school athletes win sports scholarships every year at NCAA colleges and universities."  (http://www.cbsnews.com/news/8-things-you-should-know-about-sports-scholarships/) Also, according to the NCAA, "only 460,000 of them will compete at NCAA schools. And of that group, only a fraction will realize their goal of becoming a professional athlete."  (http://www.ncaa.org/about/resources/research/probability-competing-beyond-high-school)  This fraction that will realize their goal of becoming a professional athlete is even smaller.  While there are benefits to playing sports and I am not saying we should forgo sports for academic pursuits, I am saying we need to reevaluate the priority we place on them.  The benefits of a speech and debate program for high school students and the future opportunities to use the skills they learn are limitless.   

Speech and debate training will give students the ability to consider all sides of an issue while forming their opinion or learning to defend theirs.  It will give them experience in thinking critically and solving problems.  In fact, learning communication skills is beneficial in every aspect of life from getting a job to relationships, to becoming involved in a community.  The benefits of learning to communicate effectively help students regardless of economic situation, race, or ability.  John F. Kennedy once said,  “I think debating in high school and college a most valuable training whether for politics, the law, business, or for service on community committees such as the PTA and the League of Women Voters. A good debater must not only study material in support of his own case, but he must also, of course, thoroughly analyze the expected arguments of his opponent. … The give and take of debating, the testing of ideas, is essential to democracy. I wish we had a good deal more debating in our institutions than we do now. ”

Students need to know how to communicate effectively whether it is for normal everyday conversation, public speaking, listening, or relating to others.  It is through effective communication that change is possible.  We need to let students discover their voice.  Give them the skills to consider issues, think through them, respond in a logical and mature manner to opposite viewpoints, and listen to ideas, without interrupting, to such a level that they are comprehending what is being said.

If we truly desire change in our nation, then we have to refocus our priorities.  We have to give the youth of our nation a voice.  A voice that will take them through life and lead them to paths that will strengthen them and our nation.  We can get injured and not have time later in life to play a sport and eventually we will not due to age.  However, every day of our lives we communicate.  

This isn't a debate about how much more important learning to communicate is over participating in sports but really a call to find more balance and keep our focus clear.  In the upcoming years, our nation and the world is going to need better leaders and communicators.   We cannot continue to stay strong as a nation with a crumbling foundation and focus on the superficial and short-term such as entertainment and pro athletics. We need to give our youth the skills to go beyond where they are and to make positive changes, we need to give them a voice.  It may be the last Hail Mary pass we have to succeed.


-Natalie Dyess
Founder of Intrinsic Echo

© 2015 Natalie Dyess